Bog Creatures (2003) Horror Movie Review
Horror movies Review
Selected by the world’s most over-acted expert on “European bogs located somewhere in the Central U.S.”, a group of college kids go to dig in a field somewhere in Arkansas, I mean, Denmark. Or maybe it was Ireland. Or Sweden. Hell, it doesn’t really matter because there isn’t a bog within 300 miles of this movie. Unless I’m confused on my history and bog actually means “small dirt field with a few pine trees and some poorly hung fake moss.”
Rumor has it that Viking warriors were buried in this bog and the expert professor has spent the last 10 years looking for their bodies. All of his colleagues think he is crazy for believing this.
Well not only is he crazy, he’s also blind as a bat because these Nordic Zombie Warriors are all over the freakin’ place. Seriously. You can’t swing a dead cat without hitting an undead Berserker in the wee bits. In any outdoor scene you can be guaranteed there is at least one bog creature hanging out in the background. And our EXPERT can’t spot one in 10 years?
Blah blah blah, terrible acting, 1200 year old undead Irish virgins who comprehend Modern English, witch descendants, THE END.
About Bog Creatures (2003)
Starring: T.J. Glenn, Jennifer Lauren Grant, Courtney Henggeler, Jeffrey Howard, J. Christian Ingvordsen
Runtime: 85 minutes
Director: J. Christian Ingvordsen