Cyborg 2 1999 Horror Movie Review

I’ll watch damn near anything with Jack Palance or Billy Drago.  But a film that has both of them?  I’m there.  Even if it is Cyborg 2!  The original Cyborg with VanDamme had it’s bit of entertainment value, but will certainly never be considered a GOOD movie by any means.  It’s quite easy to assume that a sequel would be totally rotten.

Strangely, it isn’t.  In fact, it’s not bad at all.  If you ask me, it surpasses Cyborg(not too difficult of a task anyway).

Cash(Angelina Jolie) is literally a walking timebomb.  She’s a new cyborg model designed to infiltrate and destroy a competing cyborg manufacturer.  She’s also equipped with feelings, so naturally she doesn’t want to blow up.  Instead she falls in love with her martial arts trainer, Colt(Elias Koteas).  Colt and Cash escape from the evil corporation called Pinwheel, and set out to find a known community where it’s not illegal to love and boink a cyborg.  This plan is set in motion by a spectral character named Mercy(Jack Palance, baby!) who can appear practically everywhere as long is there is a television to project himself on.  Mercy is head of a type of revolutionary group who has their own reasons for wanting to see Pinwheel destroyed.  Apparently he sees Colt and Cash as the catalyst for his plan.  Plus he has a soft spot for their romance coz he was in the same boat once.  Pinwheel enlist two assassins to find the couple, kill Colt and capture Cash.  One is a tough cyborg chick, and the other a disfigured psychotic played by Billy Drago.  Most of the film is a chase through smoky, Blade Runner-ish streets and alleys.

This movie might appeal to Angelina Jolie enthusiasts.  She spends most of the film leaping, flipping, kicking and trying to look cute.  Personally, that lemon sucking pout doesn’t do squat for me.  Brad can have her.  I’d like the movie just as much if Cash were played by Audrey Hepburn, Shannon Tweed or Kathy Bates.

Elias Koteas is an actor I always enjoy watching even though I don’t run out to specifically see the films he’s in.  He’s decent enough in a rather average action tough guy role.  Billy Drago is at his over-the-top psychotic best.  He’s doing some major scenery chewing whenever he’s on screen.  I love that guy!

Palance isn’t given much to do.  We don’t actually see much of him at all.  We really only see his mouth on a T.V. screen for the most part.  The movie does make good use of that cool voice of his.

I’m not gonna say that Cyborg 2 is some kind of triumph of the sci-fi/action genre.  A lot of the concepts seem pieced together from other sci-fi films, and it suffers from the typical action cliches.  Regardless of that, for some reason this movie comes off as highly entertaining, way more entertaining than it should be.  Strange how that works out sometimes.