Kracker Jack'd 2003 Horror Movie Review

....this is just a terrible waste of time. I have sat through some of the worst movies, but this is on a whole different level. I challange anyone to watch this straight through without getting bored out of your mind and having to get up. I love a bad slasher movie as much as the next derelict, but this is just a terrible excuse for a film.


Before the opening credits some ‘homies’ are passing out flyers for a house party. A big white guy who thinks he’s down says the N word and the bruthas beat and kick him to death, or so they think. The house party ends up being host to a ‘home invasion’ for a fat guy wearing a 99 cent glow in the dark K-Mart hockey mask.


The only halfway entertaining part of this movie is the unique style of CPR performed by Sistah Gurl. Someone should have told her it was mouth to mouth and not mouth to, oh you know what I mean. I wonder if she really was blowing. As much potential as the idea for this scene had, it was done poorly.


The director obviously has no idea what he is doing and ended up with a hodgepodge movie that is obviously loosely held together by an over simplified plot. If you like bad movies, God bless you, but take it from a veteran bad film buff. This is NOT a ‘so bad it’s good’ or ‘so bad it’s entertaining’ film. This is a ‘so bad I can’t believe I paid five dollars for this and I can’t get rid of it on eBay or the Pawn Shop, so I’ll either throw it away or it will sit in the back of my closet and never see the light of day again’ movies.